i deleted and re-wrote this title 10 times and in the end decided it would be title-less

It was 5:30 am, in an uber daze i was sitting in the perth international airport, doing my best not to lock eyes with anyone across from me. Mainly just not to deal with an awkward stare but also in that state of daze I am always paranoid/self conscious. There was a woman, age 22, 5'5, all the trimmings, I was still a daze and fighting in my mind with myself what would be the in to talk to this girl.... as always the winner of this fight comes around 10 hours later when i finally think of something witty and smooth enough that im sure it would work.... much to my disappointment fate doesn't wait 10 hours. But thats neither here nor there nor ever rewarding. Although a lot of my bad decisions have been made in said daze, never does it go un credited as my favourite state. It means I have just come out the other side of something that in the midst I would of question if there was ever going to be light at the end.....of the tunnel. 

This story is the lead up and lead down of my longest favourite mind set to date.

daze |dāz|verb [ trans. ] (usu. be dazed)make (someone) unable to think or react properly; stupefy; bewilder : she was dazed by his revelations | [as adj. ] (dazed) he staggered home dazed and confused.

Flying in and out of karatha to barrow island had been a daily occurrence for the last 24 days, I had 6 left when i was given accommodation on the island and no longer had the flight schedule of a pilot. After going to be at 2 that morning and waking at 4 (knowing i was going on night shift) I was to fly for the last time to barrow (the whole process of flying in through quarantine and busing around an what not takes around 4 hours) I attempted to go straight to sleep 11 came and i was dozing off. This didn't last long 3 hours later i awoke waited for a couple and started the first of 6 nights of 12 hours work and around 3 hours sleep. On the final night I worked till 3 am, didn't have enough time to sleep so just chilled in my room, packed, ate and all the other doings. We flew out on break at 11 and arrived in perth 2 hours later. I had a million things to do before my 6 o'clock flight the next morning to Java. These things finished around 9 that night where i made the "dazed" decision to get drunk and hang out with my wang out till around 2 that morning.... i woke at  4 for the flight(late i might add), so in reflecting I had slept 18 hours in 6 nights then had gone from waking up at 1 pm on my last day of work and going to sleep 25 hours later only to wake 2 hours later....3 coffees and i was in full daze mode.(I'm no longer bored so i'm going to finish this story up quick) What followed was as follows; 6 hr flight to Kuala Lumpur(NS) which was delayed so i had an hr to change planes (involving going in and out of the same airport...dont fly cheap get connecting flight) i just made the plane flew 2 hrs to jakarta (NS) drove 7 hrs too Cimaja (NS) ...cheers traffic, arrived at my hotel so dazed id come full circle and was ready to get pissed and talk shit with my brother...... he was sick and asleep fuck my life (and not fml this was more then an acronym)...What followed was 7 days of waves cold brews good food and even better company, laughs a plenty and another minimal daze on the return trip.. 

I haven't read back over this for fear of keeping myself awake and snowballing my self into a daze when i'm not in a situation where i can afford to daze. If it doesn't make sense, then have enough sense to get 10 cents and buy yourself a pretence so it all appears to make sense.

Hot showers and running cars

Here are a couple of pictures from the island on which I work and am doing my part to provide gas and oil to the rest of the world... hence keeping your showers hot and cars a-runnin. No don't thank me its all in a days work, just enjoy the hot water. Really it's no problem.

flawed quote by a flawed guy on a floor-ed rug

i was in a daze sitting on the floor thinking of all the times i have had to explain myself after being called a liar from strangers when speaking in regards to the accomplishments of my friends(most people i know are doing better things then most or i just think their legends enough for it to be seen this way in my eyes). This is a thought commonly broached when solo floor sitting with out remembering when or how i got to the floor from my bed. I came to the conclusion that "i'd be everything i wanted to be life it wasn't for my will power...fuck u will power"(this is known as buck passing when there is no-one else to pass to just give it to your subconscious) Right there and then i changed my whole perspective on shit i decided to do everything i wanted to do and become everything i could... short lived once i found all this couldn't be acheived online from the comfort of my mouse pad, big ups to people doing shit that other people wish they were doing.
I am constantly telling your stories to people I meet, and every time people are equally impressed as I am.

right? you're asking the question, you answer it!

2 weeks of passing "how ya going mate"'s were not fulfilling my fixation on finding out the cogs of this mans mind. To everyone else he was spoken of as a gentlemen in the most "Hank Moody" sense of the word, a player, casanova..... This generalisation is one of my favourite, because it is a known fact that those of Don Juan  nature are stereotypically full to the brim with confidence, and more so in the legitimate man of such ways is a confidence in which backed up by their (as close as you can be) contentment with themselves, hence the attraction of women to confident men, "if he is that sure of himself then surely he is the proverbial perfect catch". But this stems not only to females yet also to males like myself, where the judgment is "why's he so stoked surely if I do as he do I to can do to whom I please as I may do"(maybe your judgements don't contain so many 2 lettered words ending in O). Although from the sociological point of view especially in pre 30's men this is usually faked (even if not known to the presenter) and grass rooted from being over appreciated for something in their teens. How ever the mate  of whom i was asking "how ya going" was tittering on 60 and had long since forgotten the times when him and his friends would run ravage on a group of ...... groupies post a football match. No this mans confidence was genuine.

I was lucky enough to get put on a contract where me and my mate would be working alongside each other, and as luck would have it, the contract didn't demand much of the two of us so we were given a lot of time to talk(i asked he talked). I started slow with the hobbies, spouse, off spring..... you know. Then worked my way into the nitty gritty past, happiness, sadness, death? life? all the deep stuff. I could rattle on and on about everything I learnt from the Jedi, but it seemed that everything he told me came back to the same thesis "you're asking the questions answer them!" not so much so that he wouldn't enlighten me with a well detailed story for every point put across yet at the end of every story reinforcing that fact that there is no advice, book, movie, human... that you can model your life off. Do everything as you do and pay no time to the thought process that takes you away from that first answer. The whole thing was as contradictory as christianity, for if I listened and begun trying to live in this style I was then following advice...... but fuck it he is 60 and still gets tail like Vincent Chase so i'll take a little advice.
Where all the white women at... i'm contempt... i promise


Anyone for some more rhetorical.... taste like confusion